Cracked Takes on Derpy Self Defense tools

And in this case they actually do more than one thing!
(As opposed to when their resident angry man with a shotgun mocked derpy martial arts and the first four items, on a list of five, were all the exact same thing.)

This time, a different writer talks about the silliness of stun canes,  blade coins, furniture that "converts" into clubs, a dress that has spider legs that stab out, high heeled shoes that can be used as knuckle dusters or stabbing,  and phone cases that hold pepper spray,  electric stunners,  blades, or even a gun.

So yes,  congratulations on a list of absurd, bad idea weapons that are invented by people without a real plan on using them but sell to people who like the idea of having a weapon... as an accessory.

Not for nothing 1/3 of the items in the list are from fashion designers.

And the article isn't overt in it's mocking of the idea of self defense.  Though it is blatantly ageist in thinking the elderly can't handle it.